Getting the Most Out of Parent-Teacher Meetings

The mid-years are over for most students and soon it will be time to meet the teachers. It can be a tense time, and I know some parents dread having to hear negative feedback about their children. While I can’t speak for all teachers, I know that the majority are dedicated and caring; and just want to have an honest conversation with you about how best to help your child progress. So here are some tips to have a productive parent-teacher meeting.

Do Trust

It’s not uncommon these days for parents to tell teachers how they should teach their children. This doesn’t make sense to me. The teacher is a professional. You don’t hire a mechanic to fix your car and then tell him how to go about it when you get to the workshop.

I believe that trust is the first step towards having a good working relationship with your child’s teacher. Trust that your child’s teacher has his or her best interests in mind.

Do Be Open

A teacher interacts with your child for half a day, five days a week; and probably sees a side of your child that you may not. If you ask for honest feedback about your child’s behaviour in class, don’t be defensive when it’s not pleasant. Remember, the teacher is not your enemy. The teacher is on your side and wants to work with you for the betterment of your child. The most helpful response would be, “What do you suggest that we can do to help my child?”

Do Share

Earlier this year, one of my students was constantly “forgetting” to bring his homework. After punishing him a few times without having any improvement in the situation, I realised that the issue wasn’t his attitude. From a conversation with his mother, I discovered that he was sharing his room with his sister and grandmother. His mother had also just given birth to a new baby sister. Suspecting that he just didn’t have a conducive place to study, I opened my classroom, whenever I was teaching, for him to come in and do his homework or self-study. He now completes his homework and has seen a drastic improvement in his grades. One piece of information from you could prove to be the key to removing a persistent roadblock in your child’s progress.

Do Focus

Go with an objective in mind. Think about what you want to ask and when it is your turn, stick to the main issues. Be aware of and try to keep to the time slot assigned to you, especially if there are other parents waiting for their turn. Also, be sensitive to the teacher’s emotional and mental state. If the meeting is conducted after school hours, the teacher would probably be exhausted to begin with. I’ve had parents take the opportunity to have a venting session; complaining about their spouses, their out-of-control children, and their financial woes. The teacher is only interested in helping your child, not you.

Do Support

When preparing to meet parents, I always think about how they can support what I’m doing in class when they are at home with their children. For example, learning spelling, memorising the multiplication table or completing online mathematics drills. I also suggest books to read, good practice resources or even strategies that would help correct undesirable behaviours or habits.

Always make sure to ask what part you can play to complement what the teacher is doing. Feedback is only useful, if it can be acted upon.

Parent-teacher meetings are not meant to be complaint sessions. They are opportunities to find out more about your child in school, and most importantly, how you can partner with the teacher to develop him or her at home. While the teacher is the specialist in educating your child, both you and the teacher are stakeholders in his or her holistic development.

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